Gender's Troubled: Indian National RadFem Sisters, Am I Being Gaslit on Hijra Mens' History?

A Series on Male Supremacy & Sex-Based Stereotypes

Sisters of all demographics, I’m interested in any knowledge you can share on this subject:)

I desperately want the advice of Indian national radical feminist sisters. I sense I’m slowly being gaslit once again by male supremacists’ mutations. It feels like everywhere I turn online, I’m seeing transgender gender ideology being conflated with hijra men. I respect that my being Indian-American makes me an outsider to Bharat, so I‘m searching for guidance from my didis so I can once again feel tethered to reality.

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An example of the Instagram algorithm suggestions in full effect - these are posts from Indian accounts. Notice the European language and ideologies conflated with being Indian.

Sometimes it feels like being raised under sex-based stereotypes means learning to battle never-ending gaslighting. Male supremacists lie constantly, telling us our view of reality is incorrect. I continually fall deep into gender’s troubles because male culture designs it that way. To add to the problem, I dissociate, which means any message that tells me to hyper-focus on analyzing, not feeling, myself and my material reality can become dangerous. Those of us who dissociate already struggle to feel a sense of self and our material reality. So any theory that takes away the stability of reality, which is much of philosophy, can really affect dissociation in detrimental ways. If you’re not aware of this risk, you can easily untether. The more I look back on how I got so lost in gender, it does intersect with my health struggles and the philosophical/religious/spiritual information I was absorbing. Since gaslighting is a nonstop experience of “femininity” indoctrination, I am constantly second-guessing myself. So I turn to my sisters to see what light they can shed.

One recurring news story in my Instagram feed is this new version of the history of hijra males. I come from a family that disconnected me from Indian culture in the name of surviving European-Canadian and European-American assimilation. Despite my lack of cultural access, hijra men are known to most in the diaspora. Depending on what part of India your family originates from, the term and meaning changes.¹ India is one of the most diverse countries that exists, with numerous languages, dialects, and cultural specificities from Kashmir to Kerala. No matter where you hail from, if you watch enough Bollywood movies, eventually you’ll be superficially introduced to the hijra part of Indian male culture. It’s our version of men in drag on the big screen and is ultimately meant to uphold sex-based stereotypes and denigrate that which is labeled through gender’s oppression as “femininity.” But somehow, there’s this current narrative coming out of India that it’s not. I see many posts saying that hijra men are “transgender” and that this is deeply connected to Indian and Hindu culture. This stems from the ongoing narrative around “ancient” cultures and their “expansive gender.” Being a member of one of those “ancient” cultures makes you see things differently. Just like Hinduism or Buddhism aren’t some utopic, enlightened religions to me, I also call bullshit on this “gender is liberation” story hailing from India.

The history of hijras you learn in the whispers and stories in an Indian home aren’t filled with happiness. They’re like most Indian tales, full of tragedy, male supremacy, and death. Like all male cultures, Indian male culture has a long history of anti-female sexual exploitation, including child rape. The main target has always been girls, but there were men whose chosen rape victims were boys. Mostly girls, and some boys, were separated from society into child sexual exploitation. Mysticism had to “pretty-up” these realities, and with time, victims of rape became deities, married to the mandir, to the land, to the men who come at night to rape them. Indian and Hindu males love to add magic to cover up their depravity. Same story for the Abrahamic-oriented males. Many hijras were boys who were systematically raped but told they were doing a service to Bhagwan. Many were castrated and used as brothel guards for women and girls, to make sure other males didn’t rape them without a pimp’s permission. Anytime you’re trying to understand something about gender’s oppression, follow the trail of males violating women and girls. The other group of hijras are gay men trying to reinvent themselves to conform to male supremacy. Some Indian gay and bisexual men think their only option is to go in drag, because they’re ashamed of being sexually and romantically attracted to males. Some of these men play into sex-based stereotypes to gain the respect of fellow males. They fear homophobic violence while trying to excuse all forms of violence being perpetuated by fellow males. Some are coerced into the victimization of prostitution as boys. Whole communities rely on this form of exploitation to make money, similar to the family members of the women and girls trapped in intergenerational sexual exploitation. It’s why there are so many sex workers’ rights groups in the motherland. Commercialized sexual exploitation is so rampant in India that many women have resigned themselves to this being the inevitable reality of surviving. Women mistakenly hyperfocus on harm reduction and forget that it’s only a temporary band-aid on the path to abolition. There’s a misguided belief that if we normalize commercialized sexual exploitation, that women’s rights and LGB rights will be more protected. Yet it never seems to pan out this way. You can’t make any form of enslavement or exploitation humane.

In all the talk of hijras and transgenderism’s “ancient” Indian roots, there’s barely a word about women and girls. Men and boys who call themselves hijras and now transgender, are the only group acknowledged in these conversations. Not much different from when you hear about Kathoey men in Thailand, or men who call themselves trans in the US, UK, Australia, and other European diaspora-majority societies. Women who call themselves trans, women who are trying to escape sexism, misogyny, patriarchy, and homophobia, don’t seem to make it to the front page. But if you understand gender’s oppression, then you will see that this makes complete sense. Women, particularly lesbian and bisexual women, have never truly been counted within the conversations of gayness and homophobia; males’ culture of supremacy isn’t even named as the problem. The only oppression that is being vaguely acknowledged through this Indian “transgenderism” myth is gay and bisexual male homophobia. BUT, instead of calling it out, Indian gay and bisexual men are being told to dissociate and hide their homosexuality through body modification and upholding sex-based stereotypes. Why is it that gay and bisexual Indian men are going along with this propaganda? Why don’t our supposed “bhaiyas” ever name lesbophobia, anti-female biphobia, and male supremacy? Could it be that we are not in the same boat, after all?

“Homophobia” isn’t sex-neutral; it belongs to males. This is why sex-specificity matters when we do root-cause analysis. We can’t talk about hijras and Indian transgenderism unless we acknowledge that this is a male-specific conversation. When we do this, it allows us to see that male supremacy only counts males as human and “default.” “Sex-neutral” ends up meaning male. It’s only through this acknowledgement that we can have the separate conversation about what’s happening to our Indian sisters under gender’s oppression. Of course, there are women in India who call themselves trans, who perform their own approximation of drag. But since they’re women, they never get a word in edgewise. We need to call out that fighting homophobia never includes women and girls and isn’t the goal of Modi’s government.

I saw a foolish online commenter congratulating India and Iran on their views of transgenderism. I shook my head in known frustration of how foolish “western” males are, pointing to India or Iran as liberal. For me, if India or Iran are doing something, it sets my spidey-sense off to be on guard. This is how I feel about all male-led countries. The misogynistic, homophobic men in Modi’s cabinet see the male supremacist use in supporting a belief in transgender gender ideology. They see that it can uphold their existing conservative gender ideology. Except now they get to pretend that India is liberal by creating a false image. Modi gets to pretend less gay and bisexual men exist, further erase lesbian and bisexual women, and female sex-class rights. He also gets to target men and women affected by poverty, casteism, and colorism. Even Trump only demonizes transgenderism because it serves the conservative marketing goals in America. If you swapped Narendra and Donald, they’d switch their tune in order to uphold oppression. These males are frauds, doing whatever they can to attack the female-sex class under lies of “protection.” Each male leader uses gender to fit his unique market needs. None of these males have a desire to dismantle male supremacy; they want to spread it. And the only group they serve are their fellow males. They’re all in it together, protecting each other, connected through their shared male sex-class.

Famous Comedian and Bollywood Actor, Johhny Lever, portraying hijra man as “comic relief” in Rani Aur Maharani (1993)

I remember the routine appearance of men in drag in Bollywood; the portrayal of gay hijra men as the butt of the joke or sometimes the killer. I remember the colorism and casteism that was connected to the men who played these roles on the big screen. Yet the only time I ever saw a portrayal of lesbian women in Indian cinema was in Deepa Mehta’s, “Fire (1996).” Even when a woman dresses as a man, like in “Hum Aapke Hain Koun..!” (1994), it is neither meant to portray power or even “comedy gold” in the way men in drag are shown. It is seen as “adorable” the way one looks at a little girl playing dress up in her dad’s oversized clothes. Metha does a beautiful job hinting at this and other aspects of gender’s troubles in Fire.

As much as depictions of hijra men were bullying, their maleness meant they still got to grace the screens of Bollywood and they still could channel male entitlement and power. Men in drag were allowed to be shown routinely because it originated out of straight male culture to denigrate women. Hinting at male gayness is also a common trope in male cinema. But depictions of lesbian women were counter to male supremacy and so were dangerous and needed to be burned. Males want to see us burn, just like Sita. Indian men contradict themselves, demonizing female lesbianness but letting male gayness regularly appear in the spotlight. It’s a very confusing message for an outsider to the social culture of India. But when I sit back, I see a similar story in Hollywood and how they show gayness and erase lesbianness.

There’s no world in which any one woman could keep up with every mutation of male culture’s depravity. They just keep throwing shit at us. Since male culture’s depravities continually mutate, it can confuse me into self-gaslighting. I have fallen for so many of gender’s lies because of this. I start thinking maybe I got it all wrong. What do I know about these Indian males? I’m sitting in my US fishbowl. Sure, my genetics are Indian, but my nation is America (even if certain demographics of Americans tell me otherwise). Yet, living between two cultures does give me a very unique vantage point. I’m an outsider and insider to both, depending on who you ask, so I see what’s happening in my birth country, and from a distance, what’s happening in the motherland.

In my search for answers to fight this gaslighting, I discovered Vaishnavi Sundar’s work. I initially knew of her work on “trans widows” or women who are dealing with a form of male intimate partner violence that uses their belief in transcending sex to exert coercive power and control over women. It’s only recently that I found this spectacular interview she did in 2023 talking about hijra men and the conflation with transgenderism. I’m thankful to have her as a guidepost. Her words make me realize that many of the things I felt in my gut are correct. I wasn’t just an ignorant Indian-American. I was noticing something because of my specific demographics.

https://www.louiseperry.co.uk/p/trans-ideology-in-india-vaishnavi?utm_source=substack&utm_campaign=post_embed&utm_medium=web

What I found very fascinating is how Sundar spoke to the fact that many hijra men want to protect commercialized sexual exploitation, and that could explain the motivation to rewrite transgenderism into Indian history. I think this serves as an important reminder of the power and positionality of all men and boys, even when they’re facing oppression. The experiences of male victims of prostitution and female victims of prostitution may have certain similarities, but to compare them is a case of apples versus oranges. The only way to abolish all forms of exploitation against female and male people is by analysis that controls for the variables of sex and of male supremacy.

Sex-specificity is deeply important when engaging in the scientific method. For some hijra men who have worked their way up in the sex trade, they want to hold onto any privilege they can gain to expand their existing access to male supremacy. On the surface, you can see a slightly similar story with Madams or Mama-sans who worked their way up in the sex trade. But Madams can never cross that final entitlement barrier because they just can’t manage to transcend sex and become male. Yet in India, the government is officially saying they believe men can and do become female. The specificity of sex is what leads to these different outcomes for women and men, girls and boys. Strong research methods means you interrogate if you’re superimposing theories onto separate variables.

Pretending transgenderism is part of Indian history and simultaneously glorifying males’ sexual exploitation and body modification is not what’s best for anybody. It’s time for all those males who claim to give a shit, to fight for boys who are being sold through sexual exploitation, being castrated, being indoctrinated to perform the myths of “femininity” and “masculinity.” I do hope males will start looking to protect the boys who are being targeted, though I suspect it’s too far away from their actual goal of woman-hating. Since caste and poverty are inextricably linked, it’s the poorest boys, from the “lowest” castes, many times the most melanated in color, who end up trapped in these specific forms of sexual exploitation. Just like women fight for girls, I hope men will step up and fight for boys. I’m so tired of male depravity hiding behind philosophy/religion/spirituality and culture.

Hijra men claiming transgender gender ideology are trying to refashion conservative gender ideology through liberal gender ideology. If that sentence hurt your head, then you’re starting to see how gender’s troubled. All males are pushing to reinvent the past and rebrand male supremacy. And I know it’s making my head spin. I see once again I’m being gaslit by gender’s troubles. Didi, hai bhagwan, ham isake baare mein kya karange?

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After posting this piece, a sister shared an important additional resource on men who call themselves Hijra. Please read this article to get a better understanding on these men, from the perspective of an Indian national radical feminist sister: “The Myths about Indian Hijra,” Vaishnavi Sundar, 2022