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Right, Left, or Center - Still No One Can Simply Name Men
Sister, Are You Gonna Keep Mimicking Male Thinking, and Blame Everything BUT Him?
A Rose By Any Other Name…
It’s another day, and another violent male harasses, robs, beats, rapes, or murders a woman, a girl, a man, a boy, or several people, maybe another species even, or does damage to the natural or built environment. Violent males are the background scenery of our lives, our towns, our countries, our world. Homegrown or shipped in, these males are everywhere. There are so very many crimes that males overwhelmingly commit that men in power make up special categories to break down their particularities. There isn’t just one type of harasser, robber, raper, or murderer. Just zoom in on one category–the murderous male–and think of all the different types of names we give him:
Murderer, killer, serial killer, school shooter, mass shooter, family annihilator, sniper, assassin, gang banger, terrorist, SWAT team, military, National Guard, CIA, militia, guerrilla group, shootouts, drive-by’s, stand-offs, suicide by cop, murder-suicide, murder spree, and on and on and on…
Once we give a violent male his special violence categorizations, then attention shifts to his motive, and with that, a fixation on any possible angle, except his sex. We will look at his color, his creed, his tribal culture, and blame any external force possible. Or maybe we’ll call him “mentally ill” and blame internal forces of the body. But what we won’t do, what we will never state, is the statistically significant correlation that it’s almost always a male (80-90%+ of the time), and he needs to be held responsible and accountable for his impact, regardless of his fucking intent. Safeguarding society from harmful males needs to be at the forefront; this is the compassionate path for society, the victims, the survivors, as well as the perpetrators. This is what is just and fair for women and girls. We can’t afford to live in cognitive dissonance any longer, trying to blame a type of male or a type of circumstance, instead of blaming the male himself, free of excuses and justifications. Women are done arguing semantics and demand enforced boundaries that address the male sex-class’s propensity to inflict violence against women and girls. We’re done being forced to live in a constant state of vigilance and terror. We’re done having the “nature vs. nurture” red herring arguments. Women have moved on to what, we’re not getting stuck in men’s whys.
The Benefit of “Intent” and “Types” is a Cover for Males
“That wasn’t my intention.”
-Anonymous Violent Male
Male supremacy wants us stuck in categories, motives, and asking, “why god, why?!?” Predictably, each male-centered political faction around the globe uses the latest violent male to spin a tale to fit their desired hypothesis; the “usual suspect” that lives within their mental stereotype or on their hit list.
Some men and women will blame the “white-cis-hetero-patriarchal” male
Some will blame the male who calls himself “trans”, “cis”, “nonbinary”, “Christian”, “Muslim”, “Jewish”, “Hindu,” [insert spiritual ideology term here]
Some will blame the male who calls himself “Republican”, “Democrat”, “conservative”, “moderate”, “liberal”, “green”, “libertarian”, “anarchist”...
Some will blame the male based on his skin color or immigration story
Some will blame the male based on his age, citing research studies that claim he’s “too young” or “too old” to know any better
Some will blame the male based on a woman or girl: his mother, his grandmother, his aunt, his sister, the woman he spoke to once who lives around the corner and down the block
Some will blame the male based on his financial state - he lost his job, he was homeless, he never had a chance…
Some will blame the male based on his mental or neurological state - citing the DSM to claim he was “too broken” to know any better…it was his depression, anxiety, “gender identity disorder,” PTSD, Autism, ADHD, or the favorite these days, “he was bullied”, ”he was lonely.” Despite there being no mental illness that causes males to systemically harass, beat, rape, and murder women and girls, the public is quickly fed such thought-terminating lies.
Some will completely divorce the male from the equation and blame inanimate objects or the intangible and philosophical.
It was the fault of guns, it was the fault of society, it was the fault of “masculinity”, it was the fault of the books, papers, radio, TV, internet, social media, “porn,", video games, it was the fault of the school system, it was the fault of the government, it was the fault of the community, it was the fault of the family, it was the fault of the culture, the fault of a world that is “failing men and boys.” Somehow, the oppressor class of males who have built this culture is also the victim? Somehow, the architect and enforcer is rendered powerless? Somehow, males’ anti-female terrorism is never named?
If you peel yourself back from the screens and think, you will start to see the patterns. Whether a violent male is in the US, Afghanistan, Israel, Syria, Ireland, Congo, Argentina, Nigeria, etc., the male’s culpability is always erased. Of course, there are whys, reasons that males violate, but don’t you see the trap of types and intents? Don’t you see that motives are not a way to absolve men and boys of their culture of woman-hating? This absolution, of course, is purposeful in a world controlled by male supremacism-parasitism. The oppressor will always work to reframe the story so he is free of consequence. The oppressor will silence dissenters to make sure his reframed story becomes the history that fills our books. In my country alone (USA), there are several violent and/or murderous males inflicting chaos daily. Most of the time, these violent males appear in the news stories like a company on the stock ticker, just gliding across the screen in an instant; blink and you might miss the murderous male.
But when the violent male hurts or kills someone of “importance”, it becomes impossible to avoid the story of that one, specific violent male and his victim(s). He doesn’t just glide across the screen; he dominates it until you feel forced to think about him and formulate an opinion. Usually, what makes a killer or victim important isn’t about them as a full, embodied person, but what they represent. It’s actually not about being important but useful. If a killer or victim can be contorted for male power and control, then that killer or victim will fill every headline until it becomes inescapable to know their name and story. Mini-dissertations will be written by every media source detailing any possible explanation for why that particular violent male attacked his victim. Each uncovered detail pushes the one glaring link of his male sex-class to the bottom of the bin. Only the socially useful layers above this fact will be given credence.
After decades of hearing the same stories about these “types” of violent and/or murderous males—from the male murderers at Columbine to the male murderer of Dr. George Tiller, to the male murderer of Sonya Massey, Brian Thompson, Melissa Hortman, or Charlie Kirk, to the male murderers of women and girls everywhere, to the male murderers in every nation attacking each other, and destroying everything in his path—I can so clearly see the patterns, the male violence, chaos, and manipulation, that it almost hurts how obvious the answers are. The real reason it hurts, though, is because I’ve always known these truths; I just struggle to fully admit them, because that means fully seeing the scale of things and accepting that the solution will not be peaceful. This is what Andrea Dworkin, Assata Shakur, and many other women studying males’ oppression were starting to uncover and reveal to women. It’s not simply naming men and boys and admitting the depths of male violence; it’s facing what needs to be done about it: long-term, strategic, self-defense protecting women and girls, the planet, against the male sex-class. One day, we will have to fight the male violence head-on through separatism. If we don’t, we stay trapped in the cycle of enslavement. Our South Korean sisters have created a blueprint through 4B that helps us to pause and question even the “nice guys” of the male machine.
In theory, it’s easy to create niche groups of males that are the “true threat” to your safety. But in the practice of living, you’ll learn over and over again that any man or boy is capable of harming you, harassing you, raping you, beating you, or murdering you. It will be the males you trust and the males you distrust. It will be the males you know and the males you don’t know. It will be the stranger in the bushes and the men and boys in your family: brothers, fathers, uncles, grandfathers, caretakers, neighbors. It can happen anywhere: your home, the streets, at school, in the bathroom, in a hospital, in a church, a mosque, a mandir, in a safehouse, a prison, a morgue, online, in an image, a text, or in just one word or leer. Male violence has permeated every time, space, and place women and girls inhabit. The “types” of males is a lie we tell ourselves. But how hard is it for you to think of a “type” of man or boy you trusted, who violated you or someone you know anyway?
“Can’t We All Just Get Along?” is MALE-CREATED Coercive Control for Women and Girls
I want to believe in the silver lining, the hope of “can’t we all just get along.” My dad passed down this patriarchally trained coercive control to each of his daughters. When my dad was edging towards violating my mom or my mom was edging towards violating me or my siblings, I did all I could to de-escalate. I would try hard to not rock the boat; bring it back to supposed stillness. I reminded them, “Can’t we all just get along?” I tried to plead for them to see my humanity. What I’ve learned is that in a micro-setting like the family, this doesn’t work. In a macro-setting like a city, nation, or world, it doesn’t work either. The reason is that it fully ignores the difficult truth that a violator desires to violate to feel entitled, to feel power and control, and he isn’t personally concerned with justifying his behaviors. It’s not that he believes that he’s truly entitled to violate; it’s that he doesn’t fucking care, he wants to do it anyway, and he will do it and then try to get away with it. He also knows that male violence is built into the legal systems around the world, so even if he is “punished,” it’s meant not to stick. This is the ugly truth underneath it all. The simplicity of his motives leaves much to be desired. The desire of males to violate and the male systems that allow it are all so deeply disturbing; it’s easier to not rock that boat, to avoid getting to the roots, to create romanticized stories of the passionate, good male hero and the ruthless, evil male villain. That festering thing, the uncaringness that lies under male entitlement, is something a rational woman or girl can’t ever relate to, and a woman trying to preserve her mental sanity doesn’t initially want to explore. If the male who desires to feel entitled isn’t given what he believes he’s owed, he will kill to get it or, at the very least, to get the attention he so desperately relies on for his sense of self. When Truman Capote wrote In Cold Blood, he was left frustrated by the “dullness” of the male murderer’s motives. He wanted that Hollywood, Bollywood, Nollywood story. He wanted that romanticized story of male violence that he had been told since he was a little boy, by his father’s, father’s, father...He spent hundreds of pages pushing the propaganda of Male Coerced-Compliance. A big portion of the author’s persona was built on this. He even tried to siphon empathy for his own woman-hating. Oh, how Truman C. knew the male-controlled culture loved sensualized tragedies, and how the male-controlled corporations needed to sell the misunderstood, violent male. Anything to distract from the simple truth that males desire to feel entitled, and that’s their boring-ass motive for violence.
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The mental toll of realizing that half the population (and even fellow enslaved women) potentially see you as subhuman because of your sex AND might use that to justify violating you, is exhausting. Women’s practice of repression, that avoidance of looking at males’ ugly truth in the face, has led to a futile belief that we can get men and boys to “unlearn” male supremacy-parasitism, while simultaneously never directly naming males as a sex-class or dismantling sexism, misogyny, patriarchy, and ending all male entitlements. “Can’t we all just get along” hinges on the belief that centuries of systemic male violence against women and girls is a byproduct, not a planned feature and goal of males and their culture. In fact, pretending males’ desire to feel entitled and to violate women and girls could be unlearned, has become a multi-million dollar “trauma-informed care” industry that both inadvertently and purposefully trains women and girls to submit further to men and boys. It also allows males to disavow themselves of meaningful accountability and responsibility. Now, a male abuser, rapist, or murderer just strings together a bunch of therapy words and expects more lenient sentencing. I worked for years in the care work industry, thinking I could train away the problem, and my evaluation is that this method is fruit from the poisonous male supremacist-parasitic tree. We absolutely need trauma-informed care analysis, and we also need radical feminist sociological and criminalological analysis that names males’ violence. I only left the industry a few years ago and am still making sense of it all. But as I peel back more of the layers of the male violence I experienced throughout my life, I’m also starting to see how liberal-minded males coerced me into empathizing with male supremacy. I could more easily see how conservative-minded males coerced me to empathize with male supremacy through religion/spirituality/mysticism, but I was blindsided when liberal males used philosophy, psychology, and sociology to excuse male violence and coerced me to empathize with the men and boys who tortured, raped, or violated me or other women and girls. It didn’t start at that extreme; it started with males in organizer spaces, nonprofit institutions, and beyond, slowly and methodically questioning and breaking down my boundaries on non-violent crimes, until somehow the logic started creeping into violent crimes as well. When I pushed back with questions, they were circle-talked away.
Mariame Kaba is a sister on the same mission to protect women and girls, but since her analysis doesn’t include male supremacy as an entire system, it ends up hindering women and girls. Women from any political background can end up inadvertently thwarting the Women’s Liberation Movement.
What has been very interesting to observe is how “gender critical/TERF” sisters started breaking down their boundaries by using “can’t we all just get along” logic and partnering with conservative male supremacists. Just as I was seeing the truth about liberal gender, they were forgetting the truth about conservative gender. And when they appeared on the conservative males’ platforms, they always treaded lightly, never naming any part of radical feminism that goes against conservative males, but proudly using the term radical feminist when they called themselves “TERF.” At times it seems such women only care about male supremacism-parasitism if the male calls himself “trans” while ignoring male violence that is doesn’t cleanly fit into a single “type” of male supremacist. The untriggered part of me knows that we’re all just so overwhelmed focusing on one group of males that we can forget to call attention to the others. My issue comes in when I hear some gender critical/TERF women routinely call out “liberal feminist” women, naming how they broke down their boundaries by partnering with liberal male supremacists, but they ignore any of the errors of their own ways. They never seem to get that we’re both being fooled into doing the same thing, over and over and over again for centuries. The most fascinating and frustrating thing is realizing that males are orchestrating the division and binary-thinking of “liberal feminist” versus “radical feminist” versus “I don’t call myself a feminist” women, or “gender critical” versus “gender abolitionist” women. Males don’t want women to realize that the “side” or “type” of male argument is a futile distraction, just males directly or indirectly woman-hating everywhere. All us women are different in our viewpoints, but at the minimum, we need to realize partnering with any male in any capacity will always be you giving the oppressor a seat at your table. It will always be you making concessions for terrorists. Male culture hinges on confusion; don’t trick yourself into believing his lies. Don’t say you’re practicing feminism if you’re not ready to stand by all its principles. Or at the very least, fully admit your hypocrisy and stop shitting on women you see as foolish, when you’ve also been played the fool yourself by male parasitism. Realize that smugness is a male culture trait purely rooted in stupidity. It grows quite tiring and wears down patience. It’s the very thing that is starting to make me distrust any woman who calls herself “gender critical/TERF” but doesn’t consider ALL women in her analysis, and that’s when I realize that male pimps are getting their way once again. They want to separate me from other women. So I fight the urge to distance myself. I watch and wait, hoping more sisters will soon see their blind spots, just like I did. I fight the urge to judge and remember we don’t know what we don’t know. But my guard does continue to go up, because I can’t pretend my fellow enslaved sister’s betrayal doesn’t hurt.
The difficult truth we must face is that males created this myth of the “liberal” versus “conservative” male to trap us in the lie that we can educate or therapize our way out of oppression. I believe in hope, in empathy, in imagining a better future, in building nourishing social systems. Liberal, moderate, and conservative males coerced well-meaning women like myself to see males as less responsible and accountable due to the “type” of male he was labeled, and the renaming of male supremacy as "patriarchy" that “hurts everybody,” or patriarchy as a system that is god-given. Meanwhile, women in all political parties are being coerced to deny the depth, breadth, and omnipresence of woman-hating by males, particularly when we share the same color or economic class as said males. All males played us with our color and our money, turning us against our own sex. But somehow, even with all of males’ color supremacy talk or Wall St. vs. Main St. talk, males still collectively work together to protect their sex-class rights. When the chips are down, they never seem to turn against their sex. Males easily put aside their money and their color to join forces to uphold males’ woman-hating. Men twisted our capacity for empathy, our female generational trauma, our cross-sex shared demographics, and turned it all against us women into what I call Male Coerced-Compliance (a placeholder word as I think through this concept more). Women were taught to deny an important truth: that oppressors don’t give up their entitlement, and surely never without a fight. We’ve been doing “if males just knew better” trauma-informed care trainings for decades now, and we’ve yet to see meaningful, sustainable payoff. A few changed hearts and minds don’t make a tactic successful. And far too many in care work are in denial about just how ineffective our tactics really are. We can so obviously see the flaws of the “other side’s” tactics, but we never question that our own can also have flaws. There comes a time in any good strategic planning process where you admit when you’re failing, scrap it all, and close up shop or start fresh. Neither males’ Authoritarianism, Libertarianism, or Anarchism works, and it’s time for women to admit this to ourselves. We need to start fresh, rooted in female-only thinking and culture.
Even when you tell men and boys exactly why their oppressing is wrong, even when you convince some of them to see your individual humanity, even when they know the detriments of the system of oppression to themselves, males as a sex-class don’t want to eradicate male parasitism because of its benefits to them. Because an oppressor class will lose a great deal of social, political, and economic power by admitting to their entitlements (parasitism), they will never fully give up the tools of oppression. It’s the same reason why even many of the so-called feminist scholars still can’t release themselves from the tools of gender and race. The enslaved are broken-in, trained in the fear of, “a bird in hand is worth two in the bush.” Enslaved women and girls are coerced into never searching for their flock, their sisters, while being told the bird in hand, some male who coerced his way in, based on a shared demographic, is her salvation. But instead of salvation, she’s pimped from birth into the myth of the male savior - taught that the male oppressor is her best shot at surviving the man’s world stacked against her. Unlike the apparent enslavement of the male within the factory or field, female enslavement is multi-fold: in the factory or field, and within marriage/prostitution, and birthing babies. Her enslavement is a type of oppression that hides in plain sight, until no one questions it, we even celebrate it, and therefore, the remedy of male violence becomes individualized, not systemic. Fighting oppression with an individualistic model is like bringing a can of RAID to a worldwide cockroach infestation. Yes, the comparison is dark, but I use it to illustrate the depths. You ever live in a high-rise in a big city and experienced the frequent spotting of a cockroach when you flick the lights on in the middle of the night? You ever watched one of those videos showing the cockroaches living within the walls, floorboards, cracks, and crevices of entire buildings? There are many ugly truths we survive by tapping into dissociation and denial. But that doesn’t mean the ugliness goes away. Thousands of those cockroaches are living in the walls. I might be able to ignore them because I only see a few of them. But the reality is still true; the problem is still there.
The entitled male has only grown more sophisticated by co-opting trauma-informed care language and DARVOing women and girls into “keeping the peace,” or in other words, muzzling us.
Somehow, the words and actions of male woman-haters and girl-haters are always supposed to be let go, or completely divorced from their sex-based roots. When our uncle, father, brother, neighbor, or the stranger male–who denigrated us, leered at us as girls and as women, brushed up against us when no one was looking, who said we were only good for one thing, who said we are dumb and docile, meant to be barefoot and pregnant, less than human, inferior, the men and boys who said we should be dead, said we are less-than because of our sex, color, abilities, or culture, threatened us with “jokes” of torture, beating, raping, and murder–when he dies and, and we take no notice of his grave or if we dance upon it releasing years of torture and grief, how the world punishes us with manipulation, saying we lack “empathy”; how men yank us right back to that trained male culture response of Male Coerced-Compliance. Males and their enablers quickly bark at us, “be a good girl, love thy neighbor, love thy oppressor, love thy enslaver, love the male who says you’re subhuman.” The one time a woman chooses to stay silent, she is threatened that she must speak.
“Can’t you just get along,
agree to disagree?”
There are very fine people on both “sides,” don’t you know?…
The Woman Annihilator is The World Annihilator: He Won’t Go Without Killing Everybody First
As our radical feminist elders have said, women have no nation. Those words ring so true in my ears these days. I have the wisdom that comes with time and being duped by male supremacism-parasitism; the kind of wisdom that comes from watching enough years pass to see the cycles and the pitfalls. I might not have a nation; I might be fighting male violence until my last breath. But I will continue this path because I hope to explore my theories so that the girls of today can learn from my realizations and my blind spots. I sadly know that things are going to get much rougher during the remainder of my lifetime and past my death. I accepted a long time ago that my life’s work isn’t just for the present, but for a future girl or woman. The shortsightedness of males and their violence have been marching us toward a slow death. The planet itself will live on, many species will, but the male humans of our species are working against evolution, toward the endangerment of humans as a whole. Man has proven himself to be not only individually suicidal but also collectively suicidal in the name of insecurity, competition, and greed. As we continue to avoid naming men, they continue to kill women, girls, men, boys, other species, and the planet.
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Age of Stupid (2009)
If you watch this documentary, notice the neutralization of sex to discuss the root violators: males. Instead, the word “people” is used over and over again. Also, notice the many women and children shown throughout who are the most affected by the world annihilators. They are also specifically targeted because of their female sex, but the documentary never makes note of that. Men’s sex neutralization in language erases naming that males are the ones who brought us to the “Age of Stupid.”
The Men On Top Need Violent Males From Top to Bottom
Naming “types” of males but never males as a class is a delicate dance. It’s manipulation of the highest order. The average individualistic violent male is too foolish to realize that he’s being used by the males “above” him in the hierarchy as unmuzzled guard dogs of male parasitism. The violent males are purposely not addressed based on sex-class, because that would take away power from the men at the top of the Ruling Class Economic System™️. But they still need a way to point to him, and that is where his special categorizations come in. These males become the street and home enforcers of male terrorism, keeping citizens in any given radius in check, particularly the main targets: female citizens. This allows the males at the top of the organized crime system to play the persona of “protector of women and girls” while pointing to the “foot soldiers” of male parasitism as the “real threat.” To keep society distracted from ever naming males as a whole, the media will hyperfocus on the type, the political theater, anything but naming the facts: #YesAllMenAndBoys.
Sister, Give Up the Comforts of Delusion and Look at His Reality
My heart goes out to every sister struggling in her denial and coerced trauma responses, her wishful thinking for us all to get along. It seems she believes that words and debates that reach for middle ground will be enough to turn the tide of male violence, that if that one type of male is muzzled, then we’ll all be safe enough from male violence. It seems she believes that the men she claims in her personal life as special somehow are, that male culture’s hierarchies of male violence make sense.
I can no longer entertain such irrational logic. It’s time to build up your critical analysis and resilience, sister. The comforts we were promised as girls, they never existed. The “American Dream”, the “Chinese Dream”, the "Russian Dream”, the “South African Dream”...was always a lie; only reserved for the ruling class males. Sister, you and I were never seen as human in these dreams, and depending on our intertwining demographics, we fell further down the ladder of males’ denigration. When a male dehumanizes you in his thoughts, violating you becomes very easy for him. And the male’s number one violation is saying we aren’t separate, whole, human beings with our own rights, but we’re an object to be owned and controlled from birth to death by males. I hope you find a way to accept that the boat was always rocking, and you were given the futile task of balancing it so that you would remain distracted from the maleness of it all. You were thinking you served a purpose, but your only purpose was to remain enslaved by a specific group of males and lure fellow sisters through your presence. You can’t get free until you break the shackles in your thoughts first. You can’t get free until you accept that life won’t be easier when you understand the truth about male supremacism-parasitism, but fighting oppression was never about an easy path. The comfort of delusions are only ever temporary. “Ignorance is bliss” comes with an expiration date for women and girls living under male entitlement.
Name males, name their violence, and you will find yourself starting to admit the patterns that trap you. The only thing you should be mourning when another woman-hating male dies is the years you wasted believing lies about intents and types. But don’t drown in those regrets and sorrows, sister, because you are strong and can expand your resilience, one day at a time. We can learn from our struggles and our contradictions. You survived all this discombobulating male violence and you’re still here, able to tell the tale, able to persist. No matter any other struggle you’re facing, don’t lose sight of the strength it takes every single second for you to be able to still be here. Keep fucking going sister, and when I falter, please remind me to do the same. We shouldn’t have to deal with this male bullshit, but their brutalism makes it so that we have to deal with it. Don’t get distracted; the mission of female liberation from male parasitism hasn’t changed. The endgame is and always will be female joy. We have to ride out the rough waves of struggle that come with fighting the enslavers. We have to get as far as we can so that when we pass the baton to the next generation of girls, we’ve left them with some repair and progress. We have to acknowledge what our foremothers left for us when they passed the baton, as well as the harshness of the conditions they grew up under, and the harsheness of our own conditions. No woman or girl has ever had it easy or has ever been perfect. Give yourself some grace sister, and stop tearing down yourself and your fellow woman.
We Shall Overcome if We Admit We Are Not the Same as ANY Males
Female separatists know that only female collectivism can allow us to reach a sustainable, civilized society. We refuse to endlessly collaborate with members of our species that are antithetical to our strategies for thriving. The illogical, death-fearing, suicidal male must be named and stopped. Males are the broken members of our species, and they’re in their most dangerous phase of being the “world annihilators.” It’s been a slow march to their self-destruction, but in Late-Stage Male Supremacism-Parasitism™️everything suddenly feels accelerated. The violent male within the household is the same violent male who makes up our public and private institutions, our governments, our banks, our militaries, our schools, our hospitals, our legal systems, our societies. They collectively perpetuate male violence against women and girls. They collectively perpetuate damage to the universal ecosystem. Women have created pockets of our own private territories, and now we have to work toward larger goals until we have secured countries that are our own. Liberation is a marathon, not a sprint. We can’t stop all of males’ damage, but we can slowly start the path of repair as well as build upon the existing models. Our sisters around the world who have created womyn’s lands lay the blueprint that we can build on. With the help of certain technological advancements, we have more access than ever to reach our goals despite males’ irrationality and interference. We need to stop re-creating the wheel and look at past and present radical feminist foremothers’ work. We need to continue their scholarship, adding more layers of knowledge so future women can reach the goals of Women’s Liberation.
In Late-Stage Male Supremacism-Parasitism™️, each faction of males is fighting each other for power and control, and distractingly pointing the finger at some other “type” of dangerous male, tricking chosen women into believing they will protect them and leading those women to turn against their unchosen sisters. It’s now more important than ever for male supremacists to break solidarity between women. In the US and other societies where Europeans are the major group, we watch as the white male supremacists gaslight some women, particularly those who call themselves “gender critical” or “TERFs”, into believing only certain males created the conditions that led to the ever-present violence we have and still live with. White male supremacists have convinced some “gender critical/TERF” women into defending them through the misguided notion that they all exist in the same boat, and that the current conservative versus liberal male battle is about free speech. Conservative and liberal males are convincing women that a specific flavor of gender ideology is ok and inevitable. All male supremacists continue to increase their intimidation, and some women seem to be in denial that they’re shook by it. They see the increasing male violence by men and boys of all colors, creeds, and cultures, and they’re responding in survival mode as expected, while males are once again twisting things through gaslighting and brutalism. Male supremacists may be playing checkers while women play chess, but males always bring a gun to the game. They keep women trapped by ever-present male violence, that we start creating hierarchies of “safer” males. White male supremacists can easily admit the male violence by males of color, and vice versa, but all these males sure as hell never admit the male violence by their own hands. Their case is basically that they want to get rid of the “worst” men so they can downplay their supposedly “less bad” violence, ONLY if the buck stops with “Those Males Over There (TMOTs).” All I can hope is that any sister still trapped in the delusion that a member of an oppressor class will protect her will wake up and realize she can’t negotiate with terrorists. And saying whose the worst of all starts to become a meaningless infinite regression.
She is not the same as him, even if they share the same color, the same financial status, the same disabilities, the same anything, because he will always uphold his sex-based entitlements.
She is one of us, and we one of her. When a white, black, or brown male, a poor, middle-class, or rich male attacks a sister, no woman is separate from her. No woman is a “type” of woman. She’s simply a woman—adult female human—and her intertwining demographics are fully embodied in her. They only matter on some male-concocted superiority scale because he socially engineered it that way for power and control. Males categorize female humans and male humans into types, with differing intentions. Female sex-based stereotypes are designed to disembody female from human so she can be denigrated, and male sex-based stereotypes are designed to disembody males from their violence so they can be absolved of shame and consequences.
Regardless of any male myths, she is still the same as us and we are still the same as her; no matter our color, money, and so on. We are all women, in our plethora of ways. When one of us is attacked by the male sex-class, all of us are attacked.
Like it or not, we share a sex-class, that’s fighting a sex-class hellbent on terrorizing us. All sisters must stop living by male culture’s superficial hierarchies. You are not his categorizations. We as women need to start seeing our sexed selves as intertwined with ALL our demographics. It is a major mental feat to actually decolonize this male culture thinking pattern and start seeing all women as whole human beings. But once you do, you’ll be so much freer to really start your process of critical analysis. You will finally get why your radical feminist sisters push back against all male thinking, why we are so purist about gender abolitionism and mysticism abolitionism. Why we acknowledge the “intersections” (intertwinements) without pitting them against each other. Why we pay special attention to male parasitism’s relatives, colorism, ableism, and poverty. Just like a vaccine’s goal is to get as close to fully eradicating a virus. Gender, a tool of oppression upheld through sex-based stereotypes, must be as close to fully eradicated as possible if we are ever to dismantle male parasitism and all its offshoots. There is no middle ground when it comes to the facts.
As you try to make sense of the latest violent, murderous males, another crime committed by a man or boy, just remember this:
The biggest predictor, the consistent correlation behind almost every “type” of violent, murderous male is woman-hating AKA Men and Boys' Violence Against Women and Girls (MABVAWAG).
Female-hating is the one thing that rings true amongst men and boys who violate, and their brothers who enable it. Yet, after another spate of murderous American males, the current most powerful male supremacist–who has harassed, beaten, and raped multiple women and girls–thinks the following about female-hating (the same male that certain women have chosen to give a pass to for his female-hating, because he gains no benefit from denying the material reality of sex):
“They said, ‘Crime’s down 87%’, I said, no, no, no. It’s more than 87%, virtually nothing. And much lesser things; things that take place in the home they call crime. You know, they’ll do anything they can to find something. If a man has a little fight with the wife, they say this was a crime. See? So now I can’t claim 100%, but we are…we are a safe city.”
-President Donald J. Trump, USA
Did you jump to thinking of the “type” of male Donald T. is, or do you see now it’s irrelevant—that all males need him to say this, don’t speak out against this, don’t fight tooth and nail against all male supremacy, because otherwise they give up all their entitlements? Do you see it’s not about a type? That male who is trying to find a “middle ground” with you is using you for his own gain, and the cost is the entirety of female class solidarity. The cost is female liberation. Males are actively trying to rip apart women based on “gender”/sex, “race”/color, money, culture, etc. and trying to force us into “all or nothing” and “flattened sameness” thinking like them. We need to resist the urge to take the male bait and manipulations. We need to drill it into our heads, “we are not the same.”
If you are a “liberal/leftist” or “gender critical/TERF” woman, I hope you now see what your radical feminist sisters mean when we say name all males and their behaviors and cultures as the root problem. I hope you now understand what protecting ALL sisters from ALL males means. Not just the males, you are willing to admit are dangerous. It’s time to start dismantling all the centuries of male thinking you’re still influenced by and living under. It’s not about getting men on our side or needing men for our cause. It’s about admitting men are the class that is oppressing us, directly or indirectly, knowingly or unknowingly. Any male who truly wants to dismantle male supremacy already has his own cause, within his own sex-class. Any male who is latching onto women, onto feminism, onto women’s liberation movements, is purposefully not taking the reins of his own shit. He’s riding the coattails of women, so he can then blame women and feminism in particular whenever things don’t work out. All the while, he’s ensuring things don’t work out because he denies the need to start his own work to get to the male roots of oppression and dismantle male parasitism amongst himself and his fellow males. That he needs to protect boys and men from the violence of boys and men. Women and girls can only thrive and give our female descendants a fighting chance to thrive through strategic separation. Don’t wait until it’s too late to realize that it’s all males. Don’t wait until a male close to you violates you or a loved one, to realize that ALL males’ subjugation is about your sex. You can share much with males, even certain forms of oppression. But you will always be female and he will always be a male gaining from the system built by and for him. Start taking those small steps toward separating, and notice how much more aware you’ll be. Start saying, yes all men and boys, and notice how much more honest you’ll be. Notice how the missing pieces of your critical analysis finally come together. And realize that the violation of female-only boundaries expands far beyond children, sports, bathrooms, “trans”, “cis”, and “liberal gender ideology” versus “conservative gender ideology.” Realize the bullshit in your own politicking, challenge it, and change it. You will reduce getting duped by male supremacism-parasitism the more you separate from male thought and from the denial of shame and the desire for smugness. The more you entrench yourself in male thought, the more your critical analysis will be steeped in placation, until your critique is watered down to nothing at all. And in the process you will alienate your fellow sisters. When you can finally simply name men and boys, you can then start your awareness of female liberation. When you finally stop the avoidance of your shame and deal with the discomfort of really naming the male sex-class, then your radical feminist work will truly begin. It will be painful, unnerving, but worth it for the next generation’s chance to get free.
No woman or girl will stay silent anymore! Stand Up. Fight Back.
Please support my writing so I can continue this labor. I appreciate any contribution. Thank you, sisters!
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